He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
