great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
