Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
