Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
