I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Four minutes until I can fart!
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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