Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
