the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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