Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I am spending my child support on dildos
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
