just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
