I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
