I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Randomize
