Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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