i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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