Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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