I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
