so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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