:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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