I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
false alarm. still invincible.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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