Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
