theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
