Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
