You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize