im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
