you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
