He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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