Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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