omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
