Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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