Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
