we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
