i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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