so that wasnt chicken after all
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Randomize
