Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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