Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
