Rock
Scissors
Fuck
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize