What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
