hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
He did a backflip because drugs
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