I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize