are you still at the devil's house?
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
This is the high leading the old right now
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
