No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
