PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
