I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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