You're completely useless in the revolution.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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