Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
