You're so nebulous sometimes
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
