i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
