New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
