Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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