Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
just tell him i said nine months
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
