I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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