Have you finally orgasmed yet?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
